Tuesday, June 12, 2007

October 30, 2006

Today wasn't all that good. I went to Paynes, and got some coffee that I drank while I was reading from my Walt Whitman book, and wrote two poems that are sequels to each other. Please help me improve my poetry, by telling me what you think and how I should improve them.


"Prelude to Substance of Life"

Patterns of Life
Are analyzed in mind
With the paths
Being second guessed
Thought over
For a second end

"Substance of Life"

What is Life
But a place for Love
And love is nothing more
Than our most basic of emotions
With all of our Life
And all of our emotions
This Love as it's base
Then transforms forth into the substance of life.
And defines us as me are.